I don’t know much about this Elen Rives chick so I did a little digging and it turns out she’s the ex-fiancee of Chelsea and England footballer Frank Lampard and she’s having a tough time coping with the split. He’s moved on and she’s sad and lonely so I’d like to be the first to volunteer my services as a rebound hump or a crotch to cry on because that’s the kind of guy I am. Call me.
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