It’s no secret that Cheryl Tweedy and I are in love and one day she’ll come to her senses and we’ll be together, so I’m a little annoyed that her husband keeps creeping into these pictures. I guess I can photoshop myself in his place for the Xmas cards. I think Cheryl has been taking a few tips from the ‘Paris Hilton How To Duct Tape Your Boobs’ manual because her cleavage looks f@#king awesome. Now if she’d learn how to get out of a car like Paris Hilton we’d be in business.
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